Unfortunately our endeavor was tesedt right into the new year when we received the news that Pat's(my husband) brother Phil had been diagnosed with a rather dismal form of Cancer. Now, that's not to say every form of cancer isn't dismal - I know it is, what I mean is that this particular cancer doesn't hold great statistics for its victims.
During this same time, that we were waiting on the details of the cancer and treatment options, things at work for Pat started to spiral down hill at an alarming rate and we weren't even sure why, really. We were blindsided.
So, yeah, things were looking a bit grim all around and the whole idea of having the best years yet seemed to be some sort of cosmic joke. I thought to myself - I really need to stop saying crape like this out loud. It really does seem to push some kind of Ironic button out there in the Universe that causes this alarm to go off. It is like - they cant walk around so confident and secure in their lives - and heck- they even had the audacity to claim future happiness and goodness! Better nip that in the bit right way!
That isn't to say that Phil's cancer had anything to do with us - other than the fact that we couldn't do a damn thing about it. And we are even so far away we can't even be a help by just being there physically most of the time.
This post isn't supposed to be about cosmic irony though, I really do have a point here. I just thought some interesting background would help.
No this post is about people who inspire us and why?
Phil is a police officer, father of 4 and a husband to a wonderful wife. Along with over 20 years on the force he and his whole family are extremely active in their community - boy scouts, church events, school fundraisers, community clean ups - you get the idea. There is rarely a weekend where this family is just relaxing at home.
As you can well imagine getting sick and having to treat cancer - very aggressively - has many down sides and takes a toll in so many areas of a person's life. Not the least of which is physical strength and energy, mental endurance and finances. Treatment costs a lot all around. Not that you ever hear the family say much about that. They all just keep on living life with the intention of fighting this illness with all they can for as ling as possible. These wonderful people never stop giving back to the community, Phil hasn't stopped stopped working. They just keep moving forward.
But they aren't alone in their fight. This summer several law enforcement organizations put together a fundraiser for Phil and his family. The turn out was amazing! I was literally getting chills at the amount of people that were there and willing to help Phil out.
It made me start to think......
What is it in a man that brings together so much love, care and support? In the past 20 years plus, Phil has created so many relationships, friendships and bonds because of who he is on the inside. He has seen the needs in his community - whether on the job or personally and steps up to meet those needs. The really awesome thing is that all of the people around him get to witness this and are inspired by it.
For me, personally, Phil has given me acceptance and love. He welcomed me into his family unconditionally - and that included my 5 crazy kids as well. He always makes me feel as though I am important and I know that he would do anything for me and Pat.
For Pat, Phil is his little brother, by 17 or so months. But I can tell Phil is Pat's hero and has been for a long time now - even before this life's challenge that he began to go through at the beginning of the year. Pat, has watched Phil grow as a man and make choices to take care of his family in ways that other men might not have. He has seen Phil fight for his oldest son who has his own challenges in life and watch as Phil became a mentor to many young men thorough Boy Scouts.
I think that Pat will always strive to be the type of example Phil has been to so many people. (Little does Pat know that he IS being that example and more to me and my children as well as all the others lives he touches.)
If anyone would look into the window of Phil's life they would see a family that loves and adores him and a strength that bonds them all that can only come from our Savior. Heidi, Phil's wife, shows so much strength and courage that as a woman I can not help but want to be more like her, especially in hard times. She is so willing to give all she has to her family and those in need, you can really see why God has put these two together. She goes to Phil's every appointment and keeps all of us that care about them up to date on everything that is going on in Phil's treatment. I don't think she ever stops moving!
The last person I need to give accolades to is the mother of these 2 men (and to Katrin - my beautiful sister-in Law) I love, Charlie. I know that she has seen a lot in her life. She has seen Phil and Heidi give birth to a son with special needs and handle it with only the grace and strength that God can give. She has seen Pat go through his own personal struggles and become a better man for them.
Then she welcomed me into her family - this wonderful family that God gave her and she has done so well at raising and teaching the right way to live life. She has allowed me to be a part of them and I know it wasn't easy having seen Pat hurt in the not so distant past.
Charlie always includes my children as her own grandchildren and I see the pride when she says she has 14 (I think that's the number) grand kids and refuses to get text messaging on her phone because she knows they would drive her nuts with messages every day!! Ha! She is not wrong either!! I see how much she is loved!
But more importantly this is a strong mom who was single for a better part of raising her children and now she has to sit back and watch her middle son fight the biggest battle of his life.
Charlie handles all of it with such grace and courage. She is practical and honest and tries to make choices that will benefit every one. She is the one who taught all three of her kids how to give of themselves and not seek anything in return. She has been a great example and hero to all three of them. More than she can ever know. And because I have do not have a mother she has filled this role for me as well - unconditionally loving me and accepting me and mine. And I will always love her for this.
So, the people that inspire me are so many but this year - at this season of my life and in these moments of fear and uncertainty I give kudos to my new family. Phil especially but definitely not exclusively.
I pray that in my times of trials I can be the kind of person that will make all of you proud to call me daughter, sister, aunt, and wife.
I love you all!!
Caroline
Phil and several good friends of mine!!
Bob and Heidi!!
Charlie!!
No comments:
Post a Comment